What women really want from a man

WOE is no great follower of the planned life. List making is something to do under sufferance. This approach is greatly at odds with current social practice, particularly in the field of personal relationships. Internet dating sites depend on wish lists, luring participants in on the flimsy premise of unlimited potential. The net result of this is that most internet daters get annoyed, bitter and twisted (not to mention much older and less attractive) while waiting for their wish list to come to fruition.

Women like lists. Women’s magazines are built on them.  The media trades on this (how many lists have you seen detailing ways to get to orgasm, hmm?) and today’s Sunday Times has turned it into parody with this. (which came to my attention via Chris Ashford on Twitter). At first glance the criteria seems to suggest a wife. Look at it. This is an emasculating, obstacle course of chores, designed to leave no man standing.

Is that what you want in a man? Is it really that important that he brings back the kids’ swimming costumes or even that he brings back all the kids. So what if he forgets one at the swimming pool? Seriously though, this is a list made up by a group of tight-faced women with no love of men and of their differences and their ability to contribute to your life in a different way. It’s a list by and for women who treat men as possessions, not people.

WOE appreciates the pace of life and that things have to get done. But guess what, lots of those things can be outsourced. Frankly, even sex if you’re really desperate. My own lengthy, turbulent and wonderful experiences of men suggests that if you leave aside the list, you are likely to get a great deal more than you expected. From one man I learned the ability to travel with hand luggage. One lover showed me how dirty I could really be. Another took that even further. One could find taxis in central London in the rain at 11pm. Another knew every quiet pub. All were amazing kissers and possessed of wit. That, along with the ability to roll a spliff one handed in the wind, is sometimes all that you need.


1 comment for “What women really want from a man

  1. June 29, 2013 at 12:06

    I’m with you on this one. The whole tick box approach to finding a man started in the U.S. some time ago and, sadly, seems to have crossed the pond about the same time as Crocs. I can’t really say I understand the necessity for either. On the other hand, for women of a certain child-bearing age (20-50) who want children I do think that it saves a hell of a lot of time and anguish on both sides if both sides broadly want the same thing from the relationship. A friend of mine once told me that it’s rare to find a person who ticks more than two of your boxes so one should decide what those all-important boxes are. For me, a good sense of humour and something I’d prefer to keep to myself win out most times. Anyway, Ms. R, nice to have you back…

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